1. Customers are NOT people. They are savages. Expect them to act accordingly.
2. Only be rude to rude people. Being rude to polite people will turn them into rude people.
3. You probably won't have this job forever. Cheer up.
4. Remember- it's you against the customer, not you against your coworkers.
5. It helps to have codewords, as dorky as it sounds. You can talk shit to your coworkers in front of the offending savage.
6. Managers are NOT there to help you. They are there to make sure you don't steal or burn the place down.
7. A 10 minute bathroom break every day adds up. If you work 5 days a week, you get paid for 43.3 hours a year for being in the bathroom. Bring a book.
8. Mangers are usually petty. Appeal to their "authority" and they become very pliable.
9. Learn your job description. Stick to that job description. (I was hired to work in the deli but I am often asked to help out in the freezers. Not gonna happen.)
10. Learn company rules. There's a lot they haven't thought of yet that you can do to keep occupied. For instance:
I warn nearly every customer about the DiHydrogen Monoxide (H2O) that's found in their meat, pesticides, and even many reservoirs! And did you know that if you inhale even a liter of it, it will kill you?!